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Family

Who Are You Nice To?

by: Susan Russo

"Kindness is the language the deaf can hear and the blind can see." - Mark Twain

Why is it that people are sometimes nicer to strangers and people they work with than to their own family? They are polite and smile, they even say thank you and please. They talk nicely; they don't snap and yell.

They compliment them instead of constantly criticizing them. They point out their good points instead of their flaws. They laugh with them, send cards, go to parties and they actually pay attention to them when they talk.

Or worse yet, some people are nicer to other people than they are to themselves! So many people are so hard on themselves and self-critical; you might even think they hate their own guts. They beat themselves up for how they look, how dumb they are and they pick out every single imagined flaw possible.

They put themselves on heavy duty guilt trips, they don't give themselves a break, they lie to themselves about their abilities and they talk down to themselves.

Today is the day to look anew at your family and yourself. No more feeling bad or making someone else feel bad. No more criticism, looks of disgust, mean words, finger pointing, guilt trips and no more seeing yourself or them from a negative perspective.

See them for the first time the way strangers do! (Tongue in cheek.) See them and yourself for all of the goodness, joy, love and beauty that's inside. They and you are one of a kind. A sheer masterpiece of perfection on so many levels. With special gifts to give and treasures that are buried. With a light that can shine when nurtured instead of being dimmed by your unwillingness to recognize yourself or them as a gift.

Make them feel special, make them feel loved; make them feel that you truly care by doing or saying something nice.

Do not take for granted that they know how you feel just because you don't feel you have to say it. Because if for some unknown reason you lose them you'll be sorry you took them for granted and regret the fact that you didn't say what you could have now that it's too late.

Let them and you know that you're proud of them, you love them and you appreciate them. As hard as it may be, say the actual words. Children thrive on approval. Your words can make such a difference in who they are and who they become. Your partner may have forgotten why you chose them to be with.

And, you might even start to have a relationship with yourself! Loving yourself is the greatest gift you can give to yourself and to others. When you love yourself, not only are YOU happier, your family will benefit through osmosis and EVERYONE will be happier.

Strangers will come and go. But your kids, your family and you will be there through it all. (I know some people don't have great relationships with their family. And depending on your circumstances you may be better off letting things be. That is not what we are addressing here today).

So when you look in the mirror today or look in the eyes of someone who loves you or when you talk on the phone with them; make sure today you point out that it's a better day because they are in your life.

See Also:

Confidence Building Exercises: 5 Simple Ways To Boost Your Self-Esteem
In this article, I'll show you a few activities that can boost your self-esteem. Not only will you be able to present yourself better at work, you’ll also be able to socialize with everybody comfortably.

 

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