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by Dr Jeannette Kavanagh
Problems with a too-high level anxiety can start in childhood
with children and adolescents worrying to a greater extent than
their peers about all sorts of things. Some behaviors are an
indication of a fussy and over tidy child. When we go just a
little bit over fussiness and we have entered the realm of an
anxiety disorder.
Anxiety in childhood is obvious when children and adolescents
worry to a greater extent than their peers about school
performance, sporting prowess, their appearance and their
popularity. If the child has grown up with overly anxious
parents, the tendency will be exacerbated. Even quite laid back,
relaxed, children can become tense and anxious adolescents if
their parents transmit their own fears and anxieties about their
performance to their children on a regular basis.
Children who are growing up in a fairly relaxed family atmosphere
can simply come across as ideal students, and parents may even be
counting their blessings that their son or daughter does her/his
home work without being nagged about it. The highly anxious child
will be a perfectionist and s/he will require an excessive amount
of reassurance about their performance. Although we all love our
children to come home with an A grade, it is vital to watch for
signs of anxiety accompanying their school work. A child who
frets and even cries about an assignment in elementary (primary)
school, cannot automatically be diagnosed as having generalised
anxiety or indeed, any anxiety problems. However, it is good for
parents to monitor those sorts of reactions. Children and
adolescents with generalised anxiety may also worry about being
punctual, their appearance, or impending catastrophes such as
earthquakes, floods, meteors flying to Earth and nuclear war.
If you notice that your child is excessively neat - send her or
him to my place. I jest of course because we accept our children
even when they missed out on the tidy gene. However, excessive
concern about the tidiness of one's room, or how clothes are
arranged in a drawer, these are signals that say two things.
First, you just happen to have a tidy and neat child. Secondly,
the degree to which they are concerned about tidiness will let
you know whether or not that often sought-after trait is actually
a sign of their underlying anxiety. This article is not about
obsessive compulsive disorder as it's known. But it is important
to mention that all obsessive thoughts and compulsive or
ritualistic behaviours have their base in anxiety. Keeping those
socks exactly 2.5cms (1 inch) from each other, having all the
white shirts together, making and re-making the bed; those
behaviours are used to keep the underlying feeling of anxiety at
bay.
In many ways, it's easier to diagnose anxiety in children than
in adults because they haven't learned yet to censor themselves.
If they feel anxious about giving a talk at school, or even about
going to school, children will communicate that to their parents
or carers. In fact, many anxiety prone children will communicate
their fears in very clear and sometimes alarming ways. The
important thing for those around the child or adolescent with
anxiety is for us to be supportive without being enabling. By
that I mean that as a parent or older sibling, or friend, we must
treat with respect the very real fear that the child is
expressing. The injunction to "snap out of it" or the advice
that "there's nothing to be afraid of, you goose" might make
you feel alright, but it will only make the anxious person more
fear-filled. They will be less likely to open up to you when and
if their anxiety escalates. So please don't trivialise the
fears. As for enabling some parents when faced with an obviously
anxious child begin to over-protect them. They keep the child
away from school camps and sometimes even from school.
On the one hand most of you can readily diagnose whether or not
your child's anxiety switch is on overload. It's the subtlety
of some behaviors that can allow anxiety to go undiagnosed and
untreated for years. Most of my counseling clients talk about
being anxious at school and about being more generally anxious in
their childhood. Yet none of them was treated for anxiety. While
I certainly don't want to suggest that the child who expresses
worry and apprehension about delivering a talk to the class has
anxiety and needs treatment, it might be interesting for you to
keep a little diary of how your child reacts in other situations.
If it's a one-off very common fear of public speaking, your
diary will remain blank. If not, you'll have good material to
discuss with a therapist if you decide to make that intervention.
Having said that many of my counseling clients were anxious
children, it is also important to say that anxious children do
grow out of their anxiety in the vast number of cases.
Obsessive Thoughts And Compulsive Behaviors
Signs Of Anxiety In Children
Keep A Diary For Three Months
See Also:
What is
Anxiety and How to Cope
Anxiety is a feeling that everyone experiences at some time throughout our
lives. It is our natural reaction to situations we find threatening. Anxiety, in
itself, is actually a positive emotion.
However, in some people, their levels of anxiety becomes overwhelming and can
prevent them from living a normal, healthy life. Statistics show that around one
in ten people will experience symptoms of anxiety at some point in their lives.
For a very comprehensive look at the Generalized anxiety disorder and common sense ways to handle it, please visit Holisticonline.com Anxiety Infocenter.
Making Time For Your Family
When it comes to your new career plan, you may find you have even less time for
yourself and your family-especially if you have to continue to work while you
are pursuing the new goals you have set for yourself. So in order to help
balance things out, you may need to get creative.
Adolescent
Anger Management Ideas To Aid Both Parent And Child
Puberty can be extremely hard for both genders. On occasion, events around an
adolescent make them very mad. Several adolescents are clueless when it comes to
dealing with their anger in a positive manner. Therefore, they strike out at
those who matter most to them.
Copyright (c) 2010 Dr Jeannette Kavanagh
Dr Jeannette Kavanagh has a counseling and coaching Practice in Melbourne Australia, to help people find their unique solutions to anxiety and panic attacks. For over two decades, Jeannette has helped thousands of people overcome anxiety and panic attacks. Visit her website http://www.calmingwords.com/ to sign up for a FREE MP3
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